I... don't know. :-/ The image of him in the bed is one of the most haunting moments of my life, but since I hadn't been visiting him regularly at "the home", I am glad that I had that final moment where I was there, even if he wasn't awake to see it.

I only wish the realisation of my assanine-ness had hit me sooner so I didn't need that final moment like I do. *Shrug*