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I think the news has everyone a little down this week. I don't even *watch* the news, and it has me down. First, there's the hullabaloo in London; now, it looks like another hurricane is going to hit the Gulf Coast. Add to that the ongoing strife in Iraq, the steadily rising gas prices in the US, and the fact that Britney Spears might be expecting twins, and I think we could all use a little funny news for once.
So because my education is in psychology and so I'm all about promoting mental health (I promote raging lunacy, myself) and because hubby is off saving the nation from terr'rists (and so I have a lot of time on my hands), I give to you, my friends, ::cue dramatic music:: the Week in News....
Yes, I should warn you that I'm feeling punchy and my Lame Sense of Humor Key is turned on high. So I can't be responsible for any stupid jokes I make.
The Hot Seat. If you thought the hot seat involved a very popular game show from a few years back and Regis Philbin in a tie made out of tin foil, guess again. I always thought grandmas were supposed to be about freshly baked gingerbread men? (Actually, my memory of my grandparents is my grandfather asking me if I'd done my taxes yet--in December--and my grandmother warning me to "Cool it or [I'd] be on her sh*t list." I certainly was never afraid to sit on her couch. Come to think of it, I have her couch. She gave it to us when we moved and got new furniture. Uh oh....)
What a Sh*thead! Seriously, this is all kinds of f***ed up. I can't even say anything more about it. ::shudders::
Don't Be a Sheep! The cool thing for adults to say to kids when I was young was "If your friend went and jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?" Apparently, if you were a sheep, you would. The sad thing about this story is that this poor community has been devastated by this. Stupid sheep.
The Family Who *Plays* Together Stays Together. When I was in about sixth grade, I was sitting with my family in a Friendly's restaurant, and my dad was telling his friend the manager about a time he wandered into the Gay section in a porn store by mistake and another man tried to pick him up. People were like "You talk that way in front of your daughter?!" My dad dismissed it as, "She hears worse on the school bus." (My dad always believed nefarious things happened on school buses. I also waited eagerly on mine...no dice. But I can probably guarantee that this didn't happen on the school bus.)
Bee-witched. I just think this is pretty cool. But I like bugs, including bees. Hubby is afraid of them, but I think they're neat. I don't even mind being stung all that much. Yes, I know, I am weird. The above paragraph starts to explain why.
I Was Only Kidding When I Said "The Only Good Steeler Is a Dead Steeler!" I am from Bal'more, hon, and that means that I bleed purple for the Ravens and have full right to despise the Pittsburgh Steelers. Seriously. I yell "boo!" out the windows of people with Maryland plates and Steelers' regalia on their cars. But I have to give this guy props for some crazy loyalty to the Steelers. I don't think I want to be buried in my Ray Lewis jersey.
More Evidence of How Pittsburgh Is Just...Weird. No offense to folks from Pittsburgh out there. I'm sure you're very nice. But you have some weird folks in your city. (And a stupid football team, but I won't go there.) Well, I officially fear that my artwork can never lead me to be called "eccentric" again. Thanks a lot, dude from Pittsburgh. Your team always beats us in the playoffs and yet never wins the Superbowl...oh, yeah, and you do art...with Twinkies.
Know of any more weird stories? Post them! And here's to hope and smiles for the weekend.
Tirelessly and optimistically yours,
Medium Dawn Felagund of the Fountain
So because my education is in psychology and so I'm all about promoting mental health (I promote raging lunacy, myself) and because hubby is off saving the nation from terr'rists (and so I have a lot of time on my hands), I give to you, my friends, ::cue dramatic music:: the Week in News....
Yes, I should warn you that I'm feeling punchy and my Lame Sense of Humor Key is turned on high. So I can't be responsible for any stupid jokes I make.
The Hot Seat. If you thought the hot seat involved a very popular game show from a few years back and Regis Philbin in a tie made out of tin foil, guess again. I always thought grandmas were supposed to be about freshly baked gingerbread men? (Actually, my memory of my grandparents is my grandfather asking me if I'd done my taxes yet--in December--and my grandmother warning me to "Cool it or [I'd] be on her sh*t list." I certainly was never afraid to sit on her couch. Come to think of it, I have her couch. She gave it to us when we moved and got new furniture. Uh oh....)
What a Sh*thead! Seriously, this is all kinds of f***ed up. I can't even say anything more about it. ::shudders::
Don't Be a Sheep! The cool thing for adults to say to kids when I was young was "If your friend went and jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?" Apparently, if you were a sheep, you would. The sad thing about this story is that this poor community has been devastated by this. Stupid sheep.
The Family Who *Plays* Together Stays Together. When I was in about sixth grade, I was sitting with my family in a Friendly's restaurant, and my dad was telling his friend the manager about a time he wandered into the Gay section in a porn store by mistake and another man tried to pick him up. People were like "You talk that way in front of your daughter?!" My dad dismissed it as, "She hears worse on the school bus." (My dad always believed nefarious things happened on school buses. I also waited eagerly on mine...no dice. But I can probably guarantee that this didn't happen on the school bus.)
Bee-witched. I just think this is pretty cool. But I like bugs, including bees. Hubby is afraid of them, but I think they're neat. I don't even mind being stung all that much. Yes, I know, I am weird. The above paragraph starts to explain why.
I Was Only Kidding When I Said "The Only Good Steeler Is a Dead Steeler!" I am from Bal'more, hon, and that means that I bleed purple for the Ravens and have full right to despise the Pittsburgh Steelers. Seriously. I yell "boo!" out the windows of people with Maryland plates and Steelers' regalia on their cars. But I have to give this guy props for some crazy loyalty to the Steelers. I don't think I want to be buried in my Ray Lewis jersey.
More Evidence of How Pittsburgh Is Just...Weird. No offense to folks from Pittsburgh out there. I'm sure you're very nice. But you have some weird folks in your city. (And a stupid football team, but I won't go there.) Well, I officially fear that my artwork can never lead me to be called "eccentric" again. Thanks a lot, dude from Pittsburgh. Your team always beats us in the playoffs and yet never wins the Superbowl...oh, yeah, and you do art...with Twinkies.
Know of any more weird stories? Post them! And here's to hope and smiles for the weekend.
Tirelessly and optimistically yours,
Medium Dawn Felagund of the Fountain
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2005-07-09 08:13 am (UTC)I did not make this icon just for this post!
But I might have.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-07-11 01:20 am (UTC)I still feel for the poor families, though, who lost all their sheep :( And it was a little disturbing that the last ones to fall didn't die for falling on the dead bodies of their fallen (pun intended) brethren.