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This is a very, very belated birthday present for [livejournal.com profile] juno_magic. She loves Elrond quite passionately and has, in turn, given me a new appreciation for him, and so her birthday begged commemoration with an Elrond story. Thank you, Juno, for your patience in waiting for this story, which has been promised to you for a month now. I hope that you enjoy your gift, belated though it may be.

"Droplets" is a series of nine double drabbles following Elrond from his early life at the end of the First Age into the Fourth Age. I apologize for any canonical errors. As most of you know, I don't play much beyond the First Age; in fact, this is my first ever story that takes place even in part in the Third Age.

As always, comments and suggestions are more than welcome. Underaged readers should be aware that there is some mild sexual content. (How can one honor Juno without a little bit of smut, especially if it's Elrond!smut?)

And, once again, happy birthday, Juno. You are one of the reasons that I became so comfortably immersed in the Tolkien fanfic community, and I am grateful to you for this, as well as your wonderful friendship. Thank you and enjoy.


I.
The waterfall fell over the mouth of the cave in a shimmering curtain, and Elrond backed against the damp rock. His hands slipped over it; he was loath to touch it. One of them was whimpering: who? His cold hand found his brother’s, which was warmer than the rock but not much. Elrond wanted to shush the whimpering, but his throat was tight with unshed tears.

I am not afraid.

Behind the curtain of water came a ripple of color, an apparition: red cloak, black hair. A water-bright sword washed clean in the pool.

I am not afraid.

So why did he quiver, why did his heart flutter, why did the tears race down his face? He imagined that he could hear the teardrops as he could hear the waterfall, the whisper of water caressing rock. A second apparition joined the first: same cloak but red hair and a sword still crimson from battle.

The whimpering grew louder, and Elrond realized: It is both of us.

The curtain parted, water pattered raven-dark hair and rang against armor. Elrond struggled to step in front of his brother even as Elros tried to step in front of him.

I am not afraid.

II.
On the seashore, with Ada—not real Ada but Maglor-Ada—standing close enough to the icy water that when the waves rolled over, they sprayed Elrond’s face with dewdrop-diamonds of water that melted into big droplets and dripped from his face. That is our fate—to join. And then leave.

His face was numb and he was glad. He would put his toes in it too, but Maglor-Ada was near.

Elros kicked at the seagulls, screaming at them, mocking their strident, offended cries. “Get gone! Get gone, filthy birds!”

For rumors seeped like lichen between the stones of Maedhros’ fortress-home: And from the cliff she leapt and turned into a white seabird. And she flew into the West.

“Get gone!” screamed Elros. The birds scattered before his small, bruising feet that now wore practical Noldorin boots. “And tell her that we hate her! She left us and we hate her!”

Another roll of the sea and another spray of icy droplets joined the hot tears that made Elrond’s numb face burn with sudden feeling. Angry foam-fingers crawled up the beach, seeking to soak his little toes in their practical boots.

But from behind, Ada swept him away, just in time.

III.
When Elros made his decision, Elrond thought of how many weeks they still had together—many moments, many heartbeats, many walks in the garden. The land will change before my brother dies, he thought, and even then, “dies” and “Elros” were not compatible; they were laughable, side by side like that.

But as the sea wore upon the shore, so Time wore upon Elros, lining his face and touching his hair with silver while Elrond remained youthful, an image they’d once shared. Suddenly, though, looking at Elros, he no longer saw himself; it was like looking into a mirror with a warped glass. Looking at Elros, Elrond felt a leap of fearful disconnect: That is not me!

No, it is him. He is dying.

The sea reshaped the shore, eroded the cliffs where the gulls built their nests, and Elros stood with his gnarled hands in Elrond’s and the ship behind him. The sky was swollen with portends of rain. Even his voice, when he spoke, was malformed by age: “I will see you next year.”

And Elrond let Elros’ hand slip from his without a word. The waves crashed upon the shore; each droplet making infinitesimal erosions—then collapse.

IV.
The rain falling from the poisoned clouds over Mordor scalded his flesh and hissed against his armor, but still, it washed clean many things.

It washed the filth from Elrond’s face and Gil-Galad’s blood from his hands. It took the place of tears on his wearied, upturned face.

He was too tired—tired by the endless battle, by the very thought of War—to grieve, with so many lost after too few years: They passed by him, brushing him with a ghostly whisper of memory, moving on a road opposite his own. Ada. Nana. Maedhros then Maglor. Elros. Now Gil-Galad. And what of my road? he wondered. For what am I destined?

The rain washed away many things, carrying away the filth of battle in tiny rivulets to the pit that was Mordor, washing the sweat-grimed skin of the battle-weary, anointing the faces of the dead. But there were many things that it could not wash away, and they seethed inside Elrond in a bitter maelstrom. Why is it so easy to let the rain carry away the last of my greatest friend—but it cannot carry away my grief for him?

As though in answer, the rain fell harder.

V.
And then, like when the clouds crack and admit a slender sunbeam: Joy.

Yet it rained on his wedding day and, trickling among the attending crowd were the mutterings of bad omens, as tents were hastily stretched between the trees and Elrond laughed brashly in the face of the superstitions of his peers.

But now, by nightfall, the rain had subsided to the barest patter on the ceiling over their heads, easily forgotten, and Elrond placed his lips upon the pulse at his new wife’s throat, quivering in the rhythm of the rain, as he brought her to his bed for the first time.

Lace and finery slid aside to reveal the smooth perfection of her naked skin, and he gasped with her beauty, feeling his passion surge, a hot reminder of the Edain blood that rushed through his heart and settled in his groin, as she wrapped her legs around him and they sought consummation. Marriage.

She cried out with lips against his ear and bliss stabbed inside him—so keen that it might have been pain or grief—and her flushed skin received his tears. Or were they hers? Crumpled, spent in her arms, he no longer knew.

VI.
This was his memory, standing at the quay and watching Elrohir hold long to his mother, until Elladan took hold of his twin and embraced Elrohir to hide his tears.

Elrond hung back under the pretense of giving the children privacy to bid their mother farewell but, really, the thought came to him: If I don’t come forward, she will not leave. She will not leave without bidding me farewell.

He’d stand here forever—better than letting her go.

The gentle waves splashed against the sides of the waiting ship; in the most bitter irony, the day was bright and warm, fit for a wedding.

One by one, the children departed, until it was just he and Celebrian. Her face was parched and stiff; he hadn’t seen her cry since—

He refused to think of it.

So he stepped forward, to embrace her, but when he brushed her shoulder, she flinched and her hand rose to clutch the place of his touch, as though to bar some filth.

The waves clapped against the dock the whole day long, until the sea became bloodied by the sunset. At some point, she must have left. But, looking back, he could not remember.

VII.
Amid laughing fountains, Arwen told him of her choice.

He sat long in the haven of Imladris after she left, turning Vilya around his finger, pondering choices.

I could make a choice: To cast Vilya aside, to silence the horrid laughter of these fountains. To languish, imperishable, in a place of ice and death and blessed silence, where I need not be mocked by the joy of water in a place that has known something far warmer and less capricious.

But he would not cast it aside. He had made his choice, more than an age ago. That everyone whom he loved made a divergent choice….

About that, he would not be bitter.

He turned Vilya on his finger and listened to the chatter of the fountains, recalling times when they had been answered by the pattering footsteps of his children, giggling, as they hid from their mother. But she always found them and carried them to bed, and her lullabies meandered like ribbons on the wind while Elrond sat in his study, his stern hands flat upon endless parchments, quill forgotten, and a smile upon his lips.

Now, though, he was serenaded by the mocking, empty joy of fountains.

VIII.
On the tenth night of the voyage to Valinor, Elrond did not go below deck. He stood with his arms folded upon the ship’s railings, watching the water rise, glistening, and slide away beneath the ship. He let his arm dangle over the side, then made the effort to stretch; as though to humor him, a wave leapt to lick his extended fingers, making him retract them with a gasp of surprise and cold.

Unlike a journey upon the road, there were no landmarks on the sea, only endless water, a bolt of cobalt silk unfurled between the Eastern and Western shores. The ship slipped across it, the momentum of wind and destiny carrying it to the unknown West.

Overhead, rolling, ponderous clouds drooped toward the sea, sending out spools of twisting fog that married that which rose from the face of the sea. Elond’s breath came in clouds that quickly became indistinguishable from the stuff of the sky and the steam rising from the water.
Until, like curtains parting, the haze split due west, revealing a single, piercingly bright light overhead.

My father, Elrond thought, his hands clenching the railing. The first to leave.

Now, he leads me home.


IX.
In Valinor, it did not often rain, and when it did, it was expected and so people left the fields and the streets and sought shelter in the comfort of their homes. Even the birds fell silent, as though they were unsure what to do in the “grief of the skies,” as Elrond had once heard a child call it in Tirion.

But he went outside, leaving Celebrian asleep in a tangle of sheets, wrapping an afghan around himself and closing the door softly. The rain was intimately warm and made the trees as bright as emeralds, displayed upon the smoky velvet sky.

Elrond stood in the garden and let the rain wash him. If he closed his eyes against the perfect beauty of Valinor, he might be back in the lands of his birth. Perhaps I am the only fool in this land who thinks it most beautiful when it rains. That beauty is all the more poignant against the imperfect, gray sky.

Then she caught him from behind, having approached silently but laughing now, pressing her face between his shoulder blades. Letting the afghan slip away, he turned to her, to see her displayed against the grieving sky.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 02:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] frenchpony.livejournal.com
Taking a break from Le Term Paper here. . . I really like this. I especially like the way Elrond and Elros distinguish between Ada and Maglor-Ada, and the anger that Elros feels toward Elwing. Rain appears to be a neutral factor in Elrond's life -- both great joy and great grief happen in the rain -- but sunshine and controlled, flowing water are definitely bad news.

The only bit that I wasn't too certain about was the part about Elros's choice. I don't think he was an old man when he sailed off to Numenor, and I seem to remember that the ships of the Numenoreans weren't allowed out of sight of their coast. So I'm a little puzzled as to how Elrond could watch the course of Elros's aging.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 04:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] frenchpony.livejournal.com
Thank you! I hope the term paper is coming along well.

Seven pages of text so far, 11-point font, with 1.5 spacing. The requirement is 12 - 20 pages, including illustrations, musical examples, and the bibliography, which the I.N.P.O.D. (whose class this is for) wants us to format so as to take up an insane amount of paper. My goal is to write twelve pages of text, then add in maps and illustrations and musical examples and all that lovely stuff that will boost the page count nicely. The first draft is due Wednesday, and the I.N.P.O.D. will surely have comments that will lead to the insertion of even more lovely text, so I should be fairly well off.

Numenor is hard. Tolkien glosses over it really quickly, and much of the information is in HoME and the Unfinished Tales. Which, of course, contradict each other. I've always interpreted the mishmash of stories as indicating that Elros sailed off into the sunset when middle-aged at the very oldest, because he then got married on Numenor and popped out four kids. I forget how old Valandil was when Elros died, but Val was definitely an adult with an adult son who later assumed the crown.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-22 02:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kaikias.livejournal.com
I seem to remember that the ships of the Numenoreans weren't allowed out of sight of their coast.

Only going westward. Eastward, towards Middle-earth, they could go as far as they liked—hence the colonies and the alliance with Gil-Galad.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-12-08 09:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kaikias.livejournal.com
No reason he couldn't, to my knowledge.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 03:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] inkspotsbyisil.livejournal.com
I loved them! :-) Thanks for sharing!

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 04:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] niothwen.livejournal.com
That was beautiful! Water carries the echo of both sorrow and joy and is very symbolic of Elrond's life. Though I tend to think he got the short end of the stick when it came to 'joy'. It's easy to forget how much he had to suffer, until you line it all up like that.

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 11:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mirwen-amruniel.livejournal.com
Ah... Dawnie, this is truly bittersweet perfection. You very eloquently articulated his feelings here.

I too never really thought about how much he had to go through until this. =) Thanks for the eye-opener. Juno's one lucky girl.

P.S. Juno, MANY HAPPY BELATED RETURNS OF THE DAY, dear girl! *hugs*

(no subject)

Date: 2005-12-07 12:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mirwen-amruniel.livejournal.com
You're most welcome, luv. =^p

LOL. Aye. Literary Elrond is a mucho hottie. But it seems almost *whispers* incestuous for me to think of him that way...

*grin* 'Cos of my age and all, I kind of think of him as my ideal Middle-Earthean...well, dad.
*hides behind Dawn as Juno glares at her*
Okay, OKAY! The ultimate sexy dad. He's all yours, Juno. DOWN, girl.
*backs away cautiously with Dawn*

p.s. b-date: 18th July 1987 ;p

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 07:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-nightowl.livejournal.com
You know what, I think that´s the first time I´ve ever heard of anyone who´s been passionate about Elrond... *amused*

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 11:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] juno-magic.livejournal.com
There are not very many people around, I know. But Elrond has been my favourite character for 25 years now... since I was all of five years.

My (main) Elrond story is The Tides of Time and the Bones of the Earth".

Cheers,
JunoMagic

(no subject)

Date: 2005-11-21 11:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] juno-magic.livejournal.com
Thank you very muc for this wonderful birthday gift. Though your friendship is the even greater gift.

I really love this series, especially Elrond and Elros. I rarely see them together in my mind, as I "met" Elrond only long after his brother had died.

I hope you don't mind me ignoring the Celebrían drabbles as she does not belong to the Juniverse like that. ;-) *hates Celebrían's guts*

Thank you again!

*HUGE HUG*

Juno's B'day Present

Date: 2005-11-21 01:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] digdigil.livejournal.com
Oh, wow, Dawn. This was a beautiful and emotional piece of writing. I have a new love for Elrond now, too. LOL! Juno hates Celebrían's guts!!

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